There is a time for everything...
how to accept change...
“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over, instead of craving control over what you don't." ~ Steve Maraboli
Dealing with changes in my life has always been a real challenge for me. I will be the first one to admit that I like things to stay the same. As the saying goes, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
That isn’t to say that I’m afraid to try new things. For an introverted person, I think I have had some extraordinarily brave moments. Attending graduate school at a large university without knowing one soul personally, driving around Milwaukee alone without GPS (back in the 1990’s), traveling to Ireland in a tour group (including my first airplane rides), giving the eulogy at my father’s funeral…brave, adventurous, challenging experiences…
Sometimes I feel that routine leads to comfort and comfort should logically lead to happiness. However, routine can also lead to boredom and redundancy, including sometimes the fear to step outside the box and try something totally new.
And change in life is a major part of living. As it says in Ecclesiastes, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”
When I think of changes, I remember a day back in 2019 when I took my mother and son to a funeral of a mutual friend and afterwards we drove around the countryside where I grew up. We went back to the small Catholic elementary school I attended as a child in the 1970s. Other than the fact that it was much smaller than I remembered, it looked exactly the same.
Afterwards, we drove to visit one of my mother’s friends of over 50 years, stopping in at her dairy farm. These were all positive experiences that reminded me of my wonderful childhood.
Then, we ended by driving by the farm I grew up on and I am sad to say our old farm looked foreclosed, with long grass growing, missing trees and even the large barn was gone and replaced by piles of rubble...I was in shock, not even slowing down the car to take in anymore than I had to.
My Mom reacted with her typical grace saying, "Well Sheila, it just goes to show you that everything in life changes...Thank goodness for our good memories…"
As I continued our drive back to my home, I realized that once again I was supported by my incredible mother. She was sad and yet not overcome. She was surprised and yet not inconsolable.
She was instead comforted by her memories and realistic in that nothing materialistic on this earth really belongs to us. Instead all possessions are just ours for a time and they do not last forever. What does last forever are the memories we take with us.
This past week I found myself having to deal with changes in my life once more. The pastor I have worked with at my church will be retiring in order to help take care of her son and aging mother.
Routines will be changing. Uncertainty may be a part of the weeks ahead. But one thing will remain constant, despite these changes, and that will be the wonderful memories that I can carry forward….Thank goodness for our good memories…
Smile Video
This week’s smile video is from seven years ago but I would have to say it is one of my all-time favorites!
A 5-year-old in Maine has an inseparable bond with her duck. Not a toy duck -- a real, live duck. She believes she is the duck's mom, and vice versa. Steve Hartman went "On the Road" to meet this dynamic duck duo.
#spreadkindnessandlove #stevehartman #smilevideos
What I am reading…
If you stopped by my house sometime and perused my many bookshelves, you would find a variety of books, most of which fall into the nonfiction category. Among my personal favorites are autobiographies and self help books. One I have read (and re-read lately) is Amy Cuddy’s book entitled “Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges.”
A viewing of an interview of the author led me to the online TED Talk she gave in 2012 titled “Your Body Shapes Who You Are.” The concept of both her book and her TED Talk is not a new one (the importance of positive self-talk and how body language can reflect that).
What is new however is the amount of scientific proof Cuddy provides to back up something most of us have known for a long time - having a positive attitude about yourself and your life is essential to leading a happy, productive life.
Cuddy advocates how specific body languages (i.e. standing in a Wonder Woman “superhero” pose - with hands on our hips and feet shoulder length apart) can change your brain chemistry to create less stress in situations that are definitely stressful (such as the No. 1 fear of most adults - public speaking.)
Cuddy also openly discusses her personal fears and how she overcame a traumatic brain injury to become a successful Harvard researcher and professor.
The book does contain a lot of studies to back up the advice the author gives her readers and to some people that might be seen as edging toward boredom, but I personally found that information very interesting and in many cases, quite useful.
I was astonished to learn how much changing your body language has on your mind. The mind/body connection turns out to be greater than I had previously known.
Whether we want to admit it or not, unfortunately our society does “judge a book by its cover,” and sometimes our body language gives others the wrong impression or information about who we really are.
I urge you to read this remarkable book and to watch the TED Talk that led up to its creation. Both are filled with wonderful, practical advice.
Spreading kindness one cookie at a time…
If you are on Facebook, you love to bake and you live in the Wausau, Wisconsin area, I urge you to check out a volunteer group I am a part of - It’s called Cookies for Caregivers and our goal is to recognize and thank our hometown heroes who make a difference every day. CFC does that through baking, packaging and delivering homemade treats.
Cookies for Caregivers was born as a reflection of the COVID 19 experience in 2020 and began in Huntingdon, PA.
CFC was created to show gratitude by serving freshly baked cookies as a modest sign of appreciation and respect for those working in the service fields. It is also a great way to spread kindness in our community! For more information go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/cookiesforcaregiverswausauwi
Nice news…
Erin Castillo, an English and peer counseling teacher in Fremont, California, came up with a unique way for her students to disclose how they’re doing mentally and shared it on social media — and now, fellow educators from North Dakota to New Zealand are following suit.
Check it out! https://nicenews.com/health-and-wellness/teacher-mental-health-chart-students/
Quote of the week
"Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.” ~ Roy T. Bennett
Until next week. Please remember…Begin and end each day with a grateful heart…and always, always be kind….