What Matters Most…
prioritizing the people in your life
“When you are in the final days of your life, what will you want? Will you hug that college degree in the walnut frame? Will you be asked to be carried to the garage so you can sit in your car? Will you find comfort in rereading your financial statements? Of course not. What will matter most will be people. If relationships will matter most then, shouldn’t they matter most now?” ~ Max Lucado
I started this week going through the photos on my phone - looking for pictures for an iMovie I want to put together for our son’s high school graduation party. Looking back one year ago, I found a photo of Michael and my mother, sitting at her kitchen table, deep in conversation. I snapped the picture without either one of them knowing about it. It was an ordinary moment but it seemed extraordinary at the time because it had been two years since they had seen each other in person. That was one of the many negative effects of the global pandemic but that afternoon, last April, it was a start towards trying to make up for lost time.
Just a few days ago was another lesson for me of how quickly life can change. Our son’s friend lost his father unexpectedly and we found ourselves in shock and disbelief.
A sudden death, whether a relative, friend or even a complete stranger, is a striking reminder that each and every day is a gift - a gift we many times take for granted.
Death also reminds us that we are one accident, one diagnosis, one moment away from having to make a sharp turn in our presumed path.
I have experienced losing people I love suddenly, with no time to say goodbye. I also have watched others take a much longer journey to passing on, where I found myself between two very hard places - praying for their suffering to end and yet praying to keep them here with me just a little longer because a world without them seemed so inconceivable.
Regardless of how death happens, it is an inevitable part of living and how we deal with death, can help us to better appreciate our own lives and the people with whom we share our lives. It is those very relationships with those special people that we should be focusing the majority of our time on.
When someone you care about is going through grief, how can you help them? I think just being there and letting people talk, holding their hand and listening is so important. Even just sitting with them in silence, not saying a word - your presence alone speaks volumes and can bring comfort. I have been helped by many beautiful souls the last several months as I deal with my own feelings of losing my mother.
Someone once told me that grief is the price we pay for having wonderful people in our lives; for loving them and being loved by them. It’s a steep price but the way our lives are touched and the memories we are left with make it worth it.
Today and every day, I hope you take those pictures and cherish those moments. I know I will be.
Please take a moment to go to this site, which was set up by a group from our son’s school, to support a wonderful family who suffered a tragic loss this past week. They need our love, prayers and support. Thank you.
https://givebutter.com/lovefortheladeckis
Smile Video
Residents of a senior living center had trouble working their cell phones until a group of computer savvy Gen-Zers came up with a plan to save the day. Steve Hartman has their story in "On the Road."
#believe #stevehartman #smilevideos
Time to relax….
Looking for a relaxing background on your television? Meditation Relax Music Channel presents a relaxing stress relief music video with beautiful nature and calm music for meditation, deep sleep and music therapy. Enjoy!
What I am reading…
On my own grief journey I have listened to podcasts and read some very helpful books. I discovered this book while listening to Wisconsin Public Radio one afternoon last fall. Their website is
and there is also a companion book that goes with it entitled, What’s Your Grief? Lists to Help You Through Any Loss.
Personally, I am a list maker at work and at home, so this book suits me well. I think the Amazon description explains it best, “Losses, big and small, turn your world upside down. What’s Your Grief? will help you through all of them.
Many life changes need to be grieved, from the loss of a loved one to the loss of a job, from a breakup to a relocation, and all the rest of life’s ebbs and flows. In What’s Your Grief?, mental health professionals Eleanor Haley and Litsa Williams help you examine, investigate, and move through the complex but universal experience of grief.
Through seventy-five engaging, informative, and accessible lists, such as to-do (and not-to-do) lists, bucket lists, interactive lists, and more, you’ll discover:
• 5 Little-Known Truths About Grief
• 4 Reasons Guilt Is Even More Complicated Than You Think
• 9 Tips for Communicating What You Do (and Don’t) Need
• 7 Common Defense Mechanisms
• And much more
There’s no single way to experience grief. But this unique book will help you move through whatever it looks like and feels like to you.”
What are you reading? Let me know - I’d love to hear about it!
This week’s TED Talk - We all go through challenges…
I have watched TED Talks for many years now. I love the wide variety of experiences and opinions TED Talks offer. Here is one I would like to share for this week:
We all go through challenges -- some you can see, most you can't, says Michele L. Sullivan. In a talk about perspective, Sullivan shares stories full of wit and wisdom and reminds us that we're all part of each other's support systems. "The only shoes you can walk in are your own," she says. "With compassion, courage and understanding, we can walk together, side by side."
Holistic Wellness Spotlight - exploring the mind/body connection
In this meditation, Louise Hay guides you to rest, relax, and restore your body and mind. If anyone here is having a hard time falling asleep, then listen to this. This meditation will help you to fall asleep and to have a deep, relaxing experience.
National Poetry Month
Launched by the Academy of American Poets in April 1996, National Poetry Month is a special occasion that celebrates poets’ integral role in our culture and that poetry matters. Over the years, it has become the largest literary celebration in the world, with tens of millions of readers, students, K–12 teachers, librarians, booksellers, literary events curators, publishers, families, and—of course—poets, marking poetry’s important place in our lives.
This month I am sharing my favorites - Here is the second one:
Children’s Corner
Mo Willems discusses why his book Be the Bus is for adults, reveals how he turned a sketchbook into a massive children's book franchise and shows Jimmy Fallon and the audience how to draw a pigeon using only the letters M and O.
Quote of the week
Until next week. Please remember…Begin and end each day with a grateful heart…and always, always be kind….