Going with the flow
and learning not to worry (as much)...
“Nothing is set in stone. Things change all the time. Tides change, feelings change, perspectives change. Don’t worry and learn to just go with the flow.”
This week I found myself at the car wash. The unusually warm fall temperatures made that choice a logical one but I will be the first to admit that I find automatic car washes a bit unnerving.
Years ago (many years ago) when I washed my car at a car wash it involved paying with coins, driving into a garage and getting out of my car and using water hoses, sprayers and various soaps to get the job done.
Now a car washing experience involves basically no manual labor at all on my part. I just drive up, pay for the service and, with a little effort, my car goes on to a giant “conveyor belt”, where I put the car in neutral, sit back and witness the process.
The problem is I rarely enjoy the experience.
Perhaps it is a reflection of my perfectionist personality or maybe my phobia of enclosed spaces…
It seems silly to admit but I get nervous being inside the car, witnessing the giant brushes, soaps and water spraying because it is an experience where I basically give up all control over my environment, even though it is just for a few minutes.
Sometimes in life you must deal with situations where you literally have no control over what is happening. That is when the phrase, “Go with the flow” comes in handy.
Some may say that only dead fish go with the flow…that perhaps you are surrendering instead of fighting for your best interests but I prefer a different perspective.
There are simply experiences where we are not in charge of what is happening, where we must face an unknown situation and take it on fully. The only part we have control over is how we react to what is happening to us.
I will admit that I have both excelled and failed during challenging circumstances in my past. But forgiving myself, learning from my mistakes, not giving up and moving forward seems to be the best way to deal with it.
It also helps to think about more pleasant thoughts to calm your mind, envisioning places or people who bring you a sense of peace. For example, memories of fishing on a beautiful lake work well for me.
Focusing on the Serenity prayer is also a perfect example of that concept…"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference."
Now I just need to remember that the next time I get my car washed…
What do you think?
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Tranquil Moments…
I asked my niece, Jennifer Malphy, if she could share some of her nature photos with my newsletter audience. Each week I will feature a new photo. Here is this week’s:
This week’s Smile video…
Hurricane Helene destroyed a family-owned campground in North Carolina, leaving its owners facing a hard choice on how to move forward. Steve Hartman goes "On the Road" for a story on resilience and hope.
#believe #smilevideos #spreadkindnessandlove
What I am reading…
This week I am listening to Left on Tenth by Delia Ephron. I am enjoying listening to this book while I work on my newest paint by numbers project. I highly recommend it (both the book and painting by numbers projects)!
The Amazon description is as follows, “Delia Ephron had struggled through several years of heartbreak. She’d lost her sister, Nora, and then her husband, Jerry, both to cancer. Several months after Jerry’s death, she decided to make one small change in her life - she shut down his landline, which crashed her internet. She ended up in Verizon hell.
She channeled her grief the best way she knew: by writing a New York Times op-ed. The piece caught the attention of Peter, a Bay Area psychiatrist, who emailed her to commiserate. Recently widowed himself, he reminded her that they had shared a few dates 54 years before, set up by Nora. Delia did not remember him, but after several weeks of exchanging emails and '60s folk songs, he flew east to see her. They were crazy, utterly, in love.
But this was not a rom-com: Four months later, she was diagnosed with AML, a fierce leukemia.
In Left on Tenth, Delia Ephron enchants as she seesaws between tears and laughter, navigating the lows of enduring cutting-edge treatment and the giddy highs of a second chance at love. With Peter and her close girlfriends by her side, with startling clarity, warmth, and honesty about facing death, Ephron invites us to join her team of warriors and become believers ourselves.”
The poetic path…
Here’s this week’s favorite poem…
What I am watching…
This week I am enjoying rewatching a favorite time period series that I watched years ago with my Mom called Lark Rise to Candleford - In this adaptation of Flora Thompson's memoir of her childhood, Laura Timmins leaves the Oxfordshire hamlet of Lark Rise for a job in the market town of Candleford, where her mother's cousin, effervescent Dorcas Lane, is postmistress. Farm workers, craftsmen and gentry make up the community of families, rivals, friends and neighbors.
This is a wonderful series that is a gentle reminder of a simpler time, when human relationships were the center of daily life. If you would like to take a well deserved break from today’s chaotic world, I urge you to watch this endearing series which airs on PBS Passport or Britbox.
Facebook Memories
I love looking at my Facebook memories each day. This photo of my son from eleven years ago reminds me of happy memories…enjoying the simple things in life, like jumping in a big pile of leaves…
Podcast picks…
How To Be A Better Human isn’t your average self improvement podcast. Each week join Chris Duffy in conversation with guests and past speakers as they uncover sharp insights and give clear takeaways on how YOU can be a better human. From your work to your home and your head to your heart, How To Be a Better Human looks in unexpected places for new ways to improve and show up for one another. Inspired by the popular series of the same name on TED’s Ideas blog, How to Be a Better Human will help you become a better person from the comfort of your own headphones.
Mind/Body connections…
James Nestor believes we're all breathing wrong. Here he breaks down 5 ways to transform your breathing, from increasing your lung capacity to stopping breathing through your mouth.
Comedy Lift…
I love to share funny cartoons or memes with friends and family. Who doesn’t need to smile? Here’s this week’s Comedy Lift…
Music Moments
Music inspires me in many ways. Here’s Dolly Parton’s song Coat of Many Colors ...Enjoy!
Quote of the week
Until next week. Please remember…Begin and end each day with a grateful heart…and always, always be kind….
Once again, a heart-warming newsletter post. Even though I have very little time for reading nowadays, I couldn't not subscribe! Thank you, Sheila.